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October 23 2017

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fashion icon

October 05 2017



inside your body is PITCH BLACK your cells do all of that in the DARK

self care is swallowing lit matches every 5 minutes so that ur cells can see whatever the fuck they’re doing in there

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HELLO I almost forgot I was working on this, but here’s a DDADDS comic based off of this short fic by @skygemspeaks done with author permission

I just know that I love Damien so much????????????????


3 am is such a powerful time. there are people sleeping. there are people partying. there are people having a movie marathon. there are people crying. there are people loving. there are people dying. there are people living. together at 3 am.

the first google image that comes up for the homeworld gems





wow nice colors

holly blue:


yellow diamond:

blue diamond:

white diamond:

pink diamond:


blue pearl:

yellow pearl:

blue zircon:

yellow zircon






i guess like… the newer the character is the more likely its going to be a photo of an actual rock?

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Casual Titans by Gabriel Picolo

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Had a dream where I was sitting in a dark office and reality felt really altered and strange and there was just a fishtank illuminating the room and then this fuckin fish looked at me and grinned with human teeth and in this super deep voice said “you’ve been here awhile, better wake up before you forget how to” and I fuckin woke up in a cold sweat

I’ve been staring at this for maybe weeks now because I stg I have SEEN this exact fish. I had a dream as a kid where I went into my sisters closet, but when I turned on the light, it illuminated dozens of fish tanks lining the walls. The further I went into the closet, the bigger and more uncanny the fish got, until I reached the one on the end. This big fucking fish stared back at me, fucking smiled with the SAME goddamn human teeth and said, “You’re not the one who’s supposed to be here.” As soon as he finished, he started smashing against the glass. All of the other fish did the same, and I just fucking booked it back to the door. The glass started shattering and water rushed in around me as I ran. I got to the door in time to find that it was locked before I woke up screaming.




Love is dead and never existed. All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread.

Are you okay???

My cat stole my fuckign garlic bread




ok i did it


i see we’re at a stalemate

Everybody who interacts with this post dies on impact

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#freshly peeled sheeps

reblogging solely for that deeply unnerving caption



what if the clown sightings in 2016 started as a publicity stunt for the It (2017) movie but when it started spreading and all the bad news came out the production company decided to never go public? the clown sightings started during the same months the shooting of It (2017) took place



all those memes about how old ppl are bad with technology are gonna haunt us when we cant figure out how to get the apple iBrain 7 to stop autoplaying embarassing memories




comment s’appelle un chien qui vend des médicaments?

un pharmachien

why the fuck is this joke in french and why there is 26k notes am i missing something important


Pharmacien = pharmacist

Pharmachien = pharmadog

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look, amazon, when you’re right, you’re right

October 03 2017







Hey since I haven’t been active in forever, who wants to hear a story about how I became a local cryptid in my town?


Alright lets do this.

So I live in a small neighborhood kinda thing. Its honestly shaped like someone connected two bongs with a straw that leads out to the street, so very tiny and not a lot of people drive through cause its a dead end, and surrounded by woods Anyways, so it’s Saturday morning, like 3 am and my sister has taken her behemoth of a dog outside. 

Little background, this dog is a saint bernard, lab mix, so he big. Hes also amazingly stupid. He’s only three and we got him a year ago so he still does stupid shit all the time. Anyways hes got a long lead line on him, probably 30 ft, so hes off doing whatever and my sister is kinda dazed, still sleepy. 

Homeboy fucking TAKES OFF and runs into the woods behind my house, taking that lead with him and a good chunk of my sisters palm skin. Whatever he’s chasing has speed, and hes keeping up with it. So I run outside cause shes screaming his name and start to take off after him. I thought that mother fucker would get caught on a tree due to the lead but nope was I wrong. Now the woods probably go a mile back before they hit road, and then stretch around 5 miles horizontally. 

I’m worried this dumb dog is gonna run into the street and get hit, so I run the mile to the street (with my very out of shape body. I honestly thought I was going to die). After like 15 minutes of tripping and trying to make my way through this damn jungle, I get to the street. At this point I still look a human so nothing happens, I dont see him anywhere, and I run back to the house cause I’ve realized I’m in a tank top and boxer shorts with no shoes and its tick season. So I change into a big ass sweatshirt and sweat pants and boots even though its almost 90 degrees out because I do not want to have to deal with ticks. 

After chugging some water I take back off, this time going horizontally. I caught sight of something running so I took off, yelling my brains out, managing to sprain my ankle and rip half my hair outta my ponytail in the process. Around a mile down I lose sight of it so I turn and hike the mile back to the street just to make sure it didn’t go that way. 

After that I go back to my house, and then return to the spot where i last saw him and continue walking till I’m like 2 ½ miles away.

So my trip so far has been 

1 mile to street > 1 mile home > 1 mile horizontally > 1 mile to street > 2 miles home > 2 ½ miles horizontally

So I’m about ready to die. I’m covering in blood from smashing my arm, one of my eyes has turned red cause a stick poked it, I’ve got a limp, I’m breathing like a dragon with asthma, and I’m covering in leaves and sticks. 

I start yelling his name again and hear a bark in the distance so I take off and after like 5 minutes I spot him. He is now howling like a banshee in distress. I book it towards his dumb ass and practically tackle him, which ended up with me covered in a random assortment of shit. Cool, whatever. His leash is tied around two trees so I unravel it and he pounces on me in relief. He’s salivating like crazy so I take him to a stream near by to let him drink.

Mother fucker pulls me in. I’m too tired to be pissed. At this point now that I’m calming down I realize my boots are now soaking wet with both blood and water. I’ve got several scars on my thigh and they all got ripped open. So I’m gushing blood like no tomorrow. I soak my jacket in water and put it on this stupid dog so he wont get burnt on the way back and itll be a bit cooler. So now he looks even bigger then usual. I take my shoes off and toss them over my neck and we’re about to start the trek back when he takes off AGAIN. This time I’m holding the leash and I do not let go. He ends up slipping on a mud bank and taking me with him. With are now covered head to toe in mud, shit, dirt, blood, and whatever the hell else is in those woods.

Some how he has ended up with no major wounds, but now I have a rock lodged in my forehead and blood in my eyes. And my shoes are gone. Whatever, I just want to get home. I pick a direction and walk until I end up in the back yard of someone who lives down the street. 

Lucky for me, this person has barbed wire in their back yard on the ground for some reason, which I trip on. Now I have barbed wire practically wrapped around me like some crazy fashion statement. I wanted to get home so bad I didn’t even bother to rip it off. I’d do that later and return it to the guy or whatever. 

So now its like 6am, so its dark, but you can still see, and its dead quiet. I pull my sisters dog along with me, holding his collar so he can’t take off again. So heres me, covered in blood, mud, and barbed wire, limping down the street, no shoes on, with a large dog wearing a jacket, which, from a distance, you cant tell. Now I smell like whatever was in those woods, and it is a strong smell, so as I walk by any house with a dog outside, that dog starts barking. Eventually the quiet is replaced with dogs howling, barking, snarling at me.  I eventually make it back to my house, but not before passing a dude getting his newspaper or whatever. He’s a good distance away from me and he hesitantly calls out asking if I’m okay. I respond with “yeah” but I’ve been yelling for like 3 hours straight so it comes out as ungodly rasp. He goes right the fuck back in his house. 

I get home, get cleaned up, get the dog cleaned up, and everythings fine. UNTIL a couple nights later my mom goes to a neighborhood meeting thing and hears an interesting story. 

Turns out, there had been a black bear in the woods near my house, which people had been keeping an eye out for, but instead they saw (what they thought) was a “humanoid figure covered in spikes dragging a bear covered in blood around by its neck”

For the next few weeks people were talking about how they heard the “horrific screeching” and how there was blood all down the streets and on the trees. The dude who asked if I was okay was telling everybody that the “thing” growled at him and he could see it had blood red eyes. 

So now theres a rumor about a demon with razor sharp tendrils who feeds on wild animals by slashing them open and drinking their blood. Rumor states that you’ll hear it before you see it, and the sound it makes sounds like a howl and a scream. People later found my boots covered in blood and said it was a “victim” of the demon. A week later a house that was being built caught fire and that was blamed on me, as well as an accident where someone swerved to avoid something and crashed through a house. The stream turned blood red after some heavy rainfall, which was due to the mud, but also blamed on me and some more screeching was heard for a couple nights (coyotes most likely). Due to people “spotting” the demon (which was either their imagination or the actual bear) the rumor grew and grew so now its famous in my neighborhood. 

So yeah thats how I became a “bear killing demon” in my neighborhood. I never corrected anyone because I was too embarrassed. 

@gallusrostromegalus this story is honestly on par with some of yours


This is how urban legends begin.

Why would you correct them, that’s 100% baller, embrace your cryptidity.

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today’s the day

fuck I posted this a day late

Time is an illusion you fuck.

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